Experience all of These Amazing Channels FREE* August 25th, 2008 at 5:46 am

 

fuxtelGot one of those “to The Resident” offers that “put you first, second and third” in the mail the other day.

I don’t know what’s more cheesy, the bemusement that they actually think you’ll believe it or the gall of an ex-Australian plastering plagiarising, paraphernalia, in the name of red, white and blue striped ribbons holding up medallions of gold, silver and bronze all over the show.

Apparently I can be a winner too – or so Murdoch’s cacophony of cocaine, coerced advertising executives seem to claim! “This offer ends in 10 days. Call … today!”

“FREE FREE”, it says, installation and a “FREE” first month on Platinum, Fuxtel’s best package! “Box Office movies at no extra cost” See over for details!

Turning the page and squinting through glasses I’m sure it reads, in a very faint outline surrounding Box Office, Main Event and Adult Only – “Access to: $5.95 per movie.” 

But that’s not all (no, no free steak knives), there’s no fuckin’ indication of what any package is likely to cost you now or in the future and another, you guessed it, “See over for details”!

Getting out the magnifying glass and squinting a bit all I can see is something about “11mth x $37.95 (Get Started)”, nothing about any other packages but a Cancel fee applies and a # (with no reference) Changes to package effective from the start of your next billing cycle.

Let’s hope that’s less than 12 months!!

Fuck you Rupert, and the cuddly, children’s bear name you rode in on! Who’s gunna buy something they don’t know the price of?

I’m wandering what’s more scary – they actually think they can sell this shit or people are so damn silly they fall for it!

Go join the Far Kew Foxtel!

Blundering Bigfoot Blooper August 18th, 2008 at 2:59 am

 

Chewbacca on Ice!

How’s those couple of clowns who claim to have found Bigfoot!

Jesus. How dumb are they? Any idiot can clearly see it’s really a Wookiee!

I mean, how credible are these geese anyway? A copper and a screw. Sure people are going to believe them.

…and going by the size of the esky it musta been one hell of a party. What a way to go!

Off to the far kew with you jokers.

Another Bloody Blog is Born. August 15th, 2008 at 12:45 pm

I kind of stumbled on to this by a spur of the moment accident when organising some alternative hosting for another site and they threw a new free domain name at me.

Why a blog? Friends and family seem to be tiring of my relentlessly repeating rants so I thought I may as well share them with strangers too! 

I’m very new at this and have no idea if it will even last but it’s free and hopefully some whiskey inspired words of wisdom will be shortly forthcoming…